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Pursuing Your Wife: Valentines Day

###It’s a big consumerist marketing mess.

Really, it’s just another day on the calendar but that doesn’t mean my wife and I don’t celebrate on February 14th. We treat the day as an opportunity to be intentional about “getting away” from our routine. I like to think of it as a special [date night]( **Traditionally we don’t go out to dinner**; the mess of reservations and a crowded restaurant don’t make for a peaceful evening when you are both introverts. We like to find a quiet place (typically our living room) where we can relax and talk. We try our best to avoid conversations about work or the kids (though we aren’t always successful) and focus more on our desires for the future of our marriage and family. **It’s good to connect.** Sitting down to have an open and honest conversation with each other can be an *incredibly* romantic evening (*especially cuddled up in front of the fireplace*).

![living room with our fireplace](/content/images/2015/02/living-room-fireplace-1.jpg)

**I don’t buy her roses.** She *loves* flowers but the idea of me spending $30 for a dozen roses that will likely not last the week doesn’t typically appeal to her. I try to find other other options like tulips or potted plants, something a little out of the ordinary that may last a bit longer. For her it’s about being intentional about what I get for her. She doesn’t want me to spend money on her just because it’s Valentines Day she wants me to *desire* to give her a gift. It’s our job to bless our wives in every way we possibly can but it can’t be out of *duty* it has to be out of a true desire to bring joy to her heart. Trust me, she can tell.

Valentines Day can be a hot mess for many couples but it doesn’t *have* to be that way. Take the time leading up to February 14th and think about what would bless her. Maybe a fancy dinner and a dozen roses *is* what will bless her and if that’s the case go for it! What is important is that you treat your wife to a night where she’s able to relax and enjoy the company of a husband who is 100% there. She will appreciate your intention more than any fancy dinner or giant bouquet of flowers.

Oh, and buy that woman some chocolates.

###What does your typical Valentines Day look like? Do you go out or stay home?

###Who else is taking the 28 Day Challenge?

Near the end of January 2015 I felt the need to challenge myself (and others) with writing a new blog post every day for the month of February. I *need* to write for sanity’s sake and usually work better when I challenge myself. The rules are simple: write a new post to your blog every day before 10am PST. The post needs to have at least 2 paragraphs. We are going for quantity, not quality. If you join in post a link to the others who are joining in this challenge to help build exposure. This is all about helping build the discipline of daily writing.

**John C. Massie:** [](
**Twitter:** [@johnmassie](

**Christopher (Twisted Christian):** [](
**Twitter:** [@twistedxtian](

Sean Leacy

Christ follower, husband & father. Geek extraordinaire, SysAdmin & avid outdoorsman. I love to lead worship & write. #DadLife #RedeemingFatherhood