to top

I Won’t Be Silent: A Fathers Response to Rape and Injustice

fathers-response-to-rape

I can’t always be there to protect her.

I’ve spent this week trying to find the words to express my anger towards the ruling of the courts on the rape conviction of 20 year old Brock Turner and the events that have surrounded the case. What he has done will follow him for the rest of his life but it pales in comparison to the torment she will have to live with. Knowing a significant number of women who are rape/sexual assault survivors I have seen the weight of these actions decades later and the impact they make on marriages, families and the victims own self worth. It disgusts me that the rape took place in the first place but his excuses and shifting the blame were enough silence my typical quick rebuttal to the buzz around it all. This means more to me than something I can quickly tweet and wash my hands of. I needed to process this. 

A Boy And His Feels

Boy on a tablet

We can always use a reminder to pay attention to the words we are using with our children. To this day I have a VERY hard time connecting with my emotions not necessarily because I got the "suck it up" talk from my dad but because I learned from the other boys at school that any sign of them would paint me the target. I learned to stuff my emotions quickly. I learned how to hold back the tears when I felt them coming. No room for weakness. This isn't okay. It's one thing to have...

Continue reading

Our Children’s Feelings Matter

baby-sleeping

Our 2 year old daughter started sleeping through the the week before our son was born. We knew there would be some reversion in her and our 4 year old son but didn't really see it until the last week or so. She's been getting up in the middle of the night wanting to cuddle and play so I pick her up, cuddle with her in the chair for a bit then put her back to bed. This morning when I did that she had a really hard time with me leaving the room so I...

Continue reading

Kids Have Bad Days Too

depressed child

I recently read a quote out of "The Newbies Guide to Positive Parenting" by Rebeca Eanes that got me thinking about how I respond to my kids when they have bad attitudes. “So often, children are punished for being human. Children are not allowed to have grumpy moods, bad days, disrespectful tones, or bad attitudes, yet we adults have them all the time! We think if we don't nip it in the bud, it will escalate and we will lose control. Let go of that unfounded fear and give your child permission to be human. We...

Continue reading

A Cereal Changed My Life

We should all strive to respond as well as this dad. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8YmSEZ2TlzE You can see the thought process in his head, "I'm getting ready for a shift I don't want to work but have to and my son is out of bed when he should be sleeping". There is a moment of frustration, his kid jumps at the tone and replies with hesitancy explaining that he just wants to eat breakfast with him. Freeze frame. How many times do we lash out with frustration in this situation and send our kid back to bed? How many times do we...

Continue reading